A few shades of me

This past week is the first of several consecutive days of feeling not just content, but great! I have been awed and inspired by some truly amazing blogs I’ve read, had some insightful interactions with people and as a result, I feel like an inner light got switched on. What a blessing to be able to write that. Not only do I NOT have an incessant urge to write about my recent break up, I’m not harbouring any resentment towards “PP” OR “hefty”. I even almost texted the dweeb yesterday to express how happy I was for him-and then I remembered he is an abuser and that poor girl hasn’t got a clue how her life is about to be derailed, so I decided to embrace my jubilation for life selfishly and pat myself on the back instead.

I think the shift came when I was honestly able to acknowledge myself in all my addictive, obsessive, insecurity driven ways. These character set backs have been the demon on my shoulder that has kept me stuck and repeating patterns for years. Of which I’ve hidden behind the notion of being discovered for who I am. This was a paralyzing fear of which for some reason today I am not investing.